We’re often so busy pointing out the faults in others right?
But when we start introspecting and realise that we are far from the definition of perfect in the society then that’s a big slap on the face right?
As clichéd and absurd it is, the reality remains that to fit in the society we do all sorts of things. Lose Weight, wear full clothes, keep secret affairs so that no one thinks of us as a slut, stay with people we don’t want to so that we can have a good ‘image’ in the society leaving many friends behind in the process, etc.
So while we not be completely happy doing stuff the society demands, we still do it, sometimes with a heavy heart and other times happily.
But there’s this one mistake we all make.
We confuse success with improvement.
What I mean is that when we pursue stuff that the society wants, we often put our heart and soul in it to meet all expectations and hear praises, which makes us very happy on achieving the thing, no matter how grumpy we were in the beginning.
So this happiness turns into pride and we start telling our miraculous journey to achieve what we have.
This harms us in a way. We start to forget our goals and aspirations and consider a small improvement In our personality a success. Sometimes we think of it as major and other times minor.
But thinking of something we never wanted to do as our ultimate success is not cool. Priding ourselves for it is fine but considering ourselves are successful is really shitty if you ask me.
These little improvements we do are to please and fit in the society not for our own satisfaction. It’s a different thing that once we’ve achieved all this we start to feel satisfied. But remembering that this satisfaction is exterior no matter how much we like it.
The society made us think of ourselves as not good enough with all the taunts and badmouthing, and now that we can shut them up, we feel satisfied. It’s not because we achieved something we’ve always wanted. It’s because we’ve achieved something a society wants from us.
So losing weight, becoming an extrovert and having a six pack is not something I consider as a success story.
It’s basically just self improvement to shut up the society.
I wrote this post because it’s very important to redefine our definition of success. We’re all somehow influenced by the society and it is a bit unavoidable. But if we use a strong word as success for things we do to shut the society up and run away from humiliation, then this is something we seriously talk about.
What is success? It is not just something that you take pride and put work in, it is in fact something which makes us feel giddy with happiness no matter how much we need to sacrifice to get there. The pleasure shouldn’t be for shutting the society up, it should be because we’re able to achieve our goals, our purpose and our reason for being.
If we live our purpose, we’re always successful,
If we live up to others’ expectations, we’re and will always be a failure.